I just surfaced from a 3 day fictional post series I wrote to change things up a bit (Woman Not Waiting to get consumed by the gloom before feeding my creative gremlin), so I thought that a logical progression from here would be to share a bit from the world our Skinny Mermaid Salmon protagonists’ grandparents lived in— our world, today.

In 1995, Genetically Modified Organisms (GMO) landed on Earth from planet Monsanto in the evil galaxy of Frankenfood and commenced their world-wide domination. And all this happened without the consent of our GEO…Gaia Earth Organism.

I could challenge your intellect with a detailed explanation of what GMO food creation actually entails but a quick search via Google will give you more than enough brain food to keep you going like the Eveready bunny. So here’s a headline that sums it all up.

Big agritech business (Monsanto, Pioneer-Dupont, Syngenta) take perfectly healthy DNA, destroy it by adding insecticide DNA and other funky stuff, patent it (because it’s not natural so they can), and collect massive amounts of royalties, year-in and year-out.

In other words, the blueprint that creates life, that makes an apple an apple, an orange an orange, you you, perfected over millions if not billions of years by NOT-man, is defective. And scientists have the fix. Yippie-Kay-Yay!

Well, if plants need man’s help, then isn’t he just embracing his role as a Steward? And What Is A Steward Anyway again?

I certainly didn’t hear the plants do a shout out…did you?

Oh hang a sec. I just got a text.

Yep. It’s official. The silent indeed can speak. That was Mr. Cob from Minnesota.  He’s lent me many an ear in the darker times of my life, so we’ve become friends. I have his permission to share his very personal message with you.

“Guess what? I have worms again. OMG. I switched over to Bt brand genes (dang auto-correct, I mean jeans) almost a decade ago because I was just scratching so much I was going bald. Don’t ask. Now they found a way to get past the genes and are stalking me day and night. I have to eat even more worm-killer than before. My breathe is horrid. Mrs. Cob won’t let my endosperm near her anymore and I can’t even play the field. Not that I did anyway of course. LOL. So now I’m getting hot under the collar. What’s a husky guy like me to do? 😉 How was that mega storm up there in Toronto BTW?”

What a nightmare!  I hope he isn’t thinking about spreading his seed around. All that pent-up frustration might make him go wild. The poor guy. He thought the aliens came in peace but obviously there is something fishy going on in the vast open plains.

Smells like GE salmon to me.

But it’s coming from further south— from a heavily guarded facility in Panama to be precise.

Ah yes! The next new trend in interior design…bigger, faster growing, mutant fish!

Although GE stands for Genetically Engineered not General Electric, you never know what the Frankenfood galaxy will colonize us with next.  Splicing electric eel DNA into Atlantic salmon DNA could be the best invention since the light bulb.

Which brings me to the inspiration for the Skinny Mermaid Salmon trilogy.

The new FrankenFish by Aquabounty Technologies Inc. is called “AquAdvantage”. It is THE FIRST genetically engineered animal intended for human consumption. It grows at twice it’s natural rate thanks to manipulated DNA that produces growth hormones year-round.

It’s only a matter of time before the FDA approves this monstrosity and those little (or not so little) escape artists find their way out of their closed containment farming facilities into the oceans or into the sewers, as Sarah caught a glimpse of in Skinny Mermaid Salmon Conclusion.

Furthermore, plans for GE tilapia and other species are under way.


Dr. Evil will finally have his mutant sea bass with frikin’ laser beams attached to their heads…for real!

So what can a Woman Not Waiting do, you ask?

Show your power where you spend your dollar.

Here are 3 small acts that will make oceans of difference. Please, please and pretty please:

  • Do not buy salmon unless it is labeled GMO-free or GE-free
  • Do not buy tilapia— it tastes like plastic anyway (Hmmm. I wonder…maybe that’s why it’s so cheap)
  • Tell everyone you know that Aquabounty Technologies Inc. gets THEIR bounty from patenting marine time bombs

I’m not waiting one of those tickers go off inside me.

Here’s an article by the Center For Food Safety that gives a good summary of the issues surrounding GE salmon.

I invite you to share other great articles and solutions you have found by leaving a comment below.